


leaving, left home

by icanexplain



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Bisexual Disaster Lance (Voltron), Bisexual Lance (Voltron), Cuban Lance (Voltron), Drinking, First Kiss, Fluff, Gay Keith (Voltron), Gen, Hunk (Voltron) is a Good Friend, M/M, POV Lance (Voltron), Pining Keith (Voltron), Pining Lance (Voltron), Trans Lance (Voltron), also everyone is lgbt+ but i cant find the tag, but like. backstage, hunk is the biggest klance shipper out there, i also wrote this in like 2 days wow go me, i cant believe thats a tag lol, i tried to write this like a cheesy almost cringey introspective ya novel did i succeed, kind of?? idk everything's so mild, this is a bit of a ventfic but u didnt hear that from me, very lance-centric lol not sorry, we been knew
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-01
Updated: 2020-09-01
Packaged: 2021-03-06 23:54:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,345
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26237464
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/icanexplain/pseuds/icanexplain
Summary: Lance is staying home for a year while his friends go to university. No, this isn't having an effect on him. And no, Keith isn't mysteriously also affected, why would he be? What?[Set in England because I only understand this school system thank you very much]
Relationships: Adam/Matt Holt/Shiro, Allura/Romelle (Voltron), Background Relationships:, Hunk & Keith & Lance & Pidge | Katie Holt, Hunk & Lance (Voltron), Keith & Pidge | Katie Holt, Keith/Lance (Voltron), Pidge | Katie Holt & Original Character(s), pidge's is with one of my oc siblings of lance, very in the background i think there's one line lol
Comments: 10
Kudos: 63





	leaving, left home

**Author's Note:**

> i am so surprised and kinda proud of myself for knocking this out in 2-3 business days, go me! it's definitely not the mood swings what depression who  
> anyway this is really fucking soppy and i basically projected onto lance and added romance bc i love lance and keith and hate my life ✌️✌️
> 
>  **if u wanna get some background info or ur not from england and think you'll be confused by the english school system,** [here's a handy lil google doc i made for u](https://docs.google.com/document/d/1PNYCs2gxqe9kBQc2SvD_9Um1H6X_0yGW-guzb2n2z0c/edit?usp=sharing) it's got some stuff on my sibling ocs for lance and keith's family situation :) u don't have to read it to understand this fic but u can if u want ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
> 
>  **this is only teen and up for drinking, swearing, and a lil description of making out 👀** also, although lance and keith are 18 in this, that's not underage in the uk, so fuck yall's legal drinking ages thanks
> 
> anyway hope u enjoy!! uwuwuwu <33

It all begins on results day.

Well, technically, it began nine or so months ago, when he suddenly turned around and realised that maybe he wasn’t so set on marine biology and needed more time to decide what he was going to spend three years and more than £27,750 on. When he said he was going to take a gap year to think and save some money.

His family was fine with it, of course, seeing as Veronica had done the same thing the year before. Mama was very supportive and reassured him it was best to think than be rash, and Ronnie told him she’d give him all the advice he needed. Lance considers himself lucky to have his family the way that they are.

Hunk smiled in that kind way he had which made Lance truly believe everything was going to be okay for more than a second. They both knew some sort of breakdown would happen about this, as with all of Lance’s major decisions and discoveries, and he was already ready. (In fact, three months later - so six months ago - Hunk picked up the phone and hugged Lance in front of a McNugget sharebox at 8pm on a Wednesday. Lance felt bad for the family of four seated near them, who had to hear him cry like that.)

Pidge basically just shrugged and said “cool.” They brought it up twice to tease him, once in relation to being a ‘useless bisexual’ and once to ask him if he was going to become even worse of an Instagrammer and post weekly photos of himself on day trips with captions like ‘feeling free’ and a bunch of emojis. Lance still resents that, but admits it was kind of funny.

Keith acted a little weirdly, but that’s just how Keith is. In their classic competitive way, they had been gunning to go to the same university, waiting to see if only one of them would be accepted on results day. (Everyone around them had commented how weird it was - they wouldn’t be on the same course, so they weren’t competing for the same place, and what would they do if they both got in? Pidge always shot a look at Keith, who would glare angrily back at them, while Hunk would raise a suspicious eyebrow at Lance. He eventually did tell Hunk that the little hope he had for his massive crush on Keith wanted them to both get in, but only once he was drunk.) When Lance told him about his gap year, Keith got really quiet and was distant for about a week, then everything was normal again. Whatever. Lance doesn’t overthink it.

Their wider circle of friends - Shiro, Adam, Matt, Allura, Romelle - all agreed with his mum and offered their support. Romelle and Adam had also done gap years before university, and sent him resources they had found useful. Again, Lance was thankful and glad his friends were like this.

But this set in motion a wonderful domino effect, which, as it seems, reaches its peak now, on results day.

He’s passed everything, and done maybe a little better than average in some subjects. His twin, Jai, who’s already been accepted into an art college, has also done pretty well in everything other than art, where they’ve shined, and the two of them hug in relief. His parents are proud, and he immediately gets on the group chat to find out how everyone else has done.

Pidge, genius they are, has got top marks in all subjects despite being two years younger than everyone else in their year. Everyone congratulates them even though this was the only reasonable result. Hunk and Keith have also done incredibly well, which is also no surprise, and Lance sends celebration emojis as his stomach drops a little.

 **hunk 💛🔥✨🌻:** lance wbu? all good?

In theory, yes, all good. But this is in practice. His results pale in comparison to his friends’, and he doesn’t want the all-too-familiar pitying “that’s still good!”s and “all that matters is if you’re happy”s, and his thoughts go down the usual routes until he ends up typing a quick “gtg sorry family calling”. Before he knows it, he’s pocketing his phone, ignoring the buzzing, and trying to distract himself with the cake his mama’s baked, as she did for all his older siblings’ results, even when Lur failed English and Amara just scraped Chemistry.

Lance knows Hunk, Keith and Pidge are talking about him on that other group chat because he’s seen the group name on Hunk’s phone (“is the blue boy okay”, which makes Lance feel a bit sick every time he thinks about it too much) and it’s what they always do when he’s being difficult and annoying and _dumb and anxious and_. Hunk texts him five minutes later asking to call and the knot in Lance’s stomach twists into one of those impossible shapes they put on maths posters. He wants to, to say how shit he feels that all he can do is be indecisive and average in a family of people with plans and a friendship group full of geniuses, but he can’t because Hunk is too nice and doesn’t deserve it and would probably blame himself somehow even though nothing is ever his fault, it’s almost always Lance’s. 

He eventually texts back that he passed everything and he’s busy with the traditional cake, _sorry, we can call later?_ Hunk agrees, angel he is, and Lance excuses himself to the bathroom to, once again, stare at his mirrored atoms and ponder questions he probably should leave for later, or never. Jai follows after four and a half minutes and he puts on a facade for exactly three seconds before hugging them and trying very hard not to cry. The mask comes back on in the dining room and he catches looks he doesn’t want to understand being thrown between siblings and parents.

He curses himself and they go to Cuba for a couple weeks. It’s nice, as always, and he’s distracted most of the time, especially because of the time difference. He talks with his friends, but it’s never that deep. Keith all but disappears and Lance stares wistfully into the sunset like a cheesy teenage romance novel’s protagonist multiple times, before reminding himself he could never be a protagonist. He’s a trans bisexual Cuban, after all. Ronnie finds this hilarious and agrees.

———

They come back and everything gets worse.

First, Pidge lets slip that the three of them met up with their other friends, who are usually a lot harder to get a hold of, the day before Lance came back. It shouldn’t matter, because it’s not like all his friends’ lives should revolve around him, but it makes him wake up crying at 3am and he hates himself when Jai listens to his rambling. It dims when they ramble in return about the girl they like going to university on the other side of the country, but, as always, it is still there. Ever-present things tend to do that.

Then, he realises that time has indeed passed, and he’s only got three weeks or so before his best friends of four or more years will leave, and he panics.

He goes on a few walks with Hunk and they don’t really talk about anything, but it’s nice. A couple times, Pidge joins them and complains about August and the sun and their pale, pale skin. Keith is nowhere to be found, and when Lance asks Pidge about it, they glance at Hunk and say something vague about Keith and Shiro’s family in Japan. 

This turns out to be a bit of a lie when he messages Shiro about it, hoping that his family are well. Shiro asks how he knows, which makes Lance think that Keith has talked to Shiro about not interacting with Lance at all, and then explains that a grandparent had a fall a week ago but everything’s fine now. Lance cries again that night, but this time it’s Lur who comforts him. It’s nicer in this situation because she knows nothing she could say will make it better, so she just drives him, still sort of sobbing, to the 24-hour petrol station and they eat shitty ice cream out of the tub while sitting on the roof of her small car, parked at the gate of an empty field, in the dark. It’s all painfully human, and she tells him most things are, and as human, they will pass.

He knows, but it’s hard. The first week passes and now there’s only two until everything changes.

Except everything changes before then.

Their larger group of friends are all nearby again for a little while and immediately Adam suggests they meet up at the park in town for a picnic, to which everyone readily agrees. Even Keith replies on the group chat, but he and Lance don’t interact.

The picnic is (really, kind of, not) great, but because it’s daytime, everyone is nice and normal and nothing really comes of it. Shiro talks about a promotion Keith, Matt and Adam already knew of, and Romelle tells everyone her long-term plans for a small art gallery she wants to own, Allura smiling softly at her the whole time. University preparations are discussed, advice and progress being thrown around, and once again Lance feels like an impostor. He catches Keith staring at him four times but they don’t really speak to each other. He wonders if anyone else feels the weird imbalance he does and regrets existing as he sits on the bus and stares at a squirrel living its best life, running along a branch like a loading bar in a game.

Switch playlist. Volume up. Question everything. Repeat.

He’s forgotten to download this playlist and his data isn’t working. This is when everything begins to change.

Rolling his eyes at himself, he switches back and hopes his data will work later so he can use Google Maps to find the shop Ronnie was talking about, because he can’t remember the way and two other potential jobs have already fallen through this week and he really needs to find one before September. Glancing up to check how far into the bus route he is, he freezes.

Keith. Is buying a ticket.

Lance begins to panic. Even though nothing has been said, seeing as they didn’t even talk at the picnic the other day, it feels like something between them has changed, and he doesn’t know how to react to that. Actually, if he’s being honest, his reaction was to cry with his siblings because it really does seem like Keith has decided Lance isn’t worth his time and that sort of breaks his heart or whatever. He screams at himself to _calm down, it’s only Keith, just act like you always do with Keith_ , as the bus driver prints the ticket and Keith rips it out of the machine and Troye Sivan is suddenly very loud in his ears so he mutes the audio and forces himself to move his gaze out of the window.

It’s almost like he can sense Keith turning around, scanning for seats near the back as he always does, and noticing Lance. He takes a hopefully subtle, steadying breath, and looks up in the most casual way he can muster. Pretending to see Keith for the first time isn’t too hard, and he smiles widely, pops out one of his silent earbuds and lifts a hand in a little wave he normally does. Normal. Everything’s fine.

“Hey, Keith!”

Keith is still half frozen, clearly walking on autopilot and staring at Lance like he’s a fire that’s spreading very quickly. Mostly fear, but a little touch of what might be awe in there that both intrigues and worries Lance. After a very slow second of no reaction, Keith cracks an awkward half-smile and glances at an empty seat away from Lance.

Oh no. No way. Lance is not allowing that.

Quickly, he moves his bag off the seat next to him and very obviously indicates to Keith to sit next to him. They both know that if Keith does not do so, Lance will make at least a third of a scene, which Keith hates, so he sits down as Lance wants. It is a blessing and a curse that they know each other so well.

“Hey,” Keith finally replies, and Lance can easily tell he’s tense in the way he’s sitting and how his toes are curling and uncurling in his shoes. He decides to be nice and not bring up the fact that Keith has been ignoring him ever since he left for Cuba three and a half weeks ago on a public bus.

“So, how have you been? Uni prep keeping you busy?” Lance crosses one leg over the other to show Keith he’s chill and not mad or feeling awkward, even if he might be. He watches Keith notice and relax a little, feeling overwhelmed for a couple seconds, once again, at how easily he can read this boy.

Keith takes the lifeline. “Yeah, really busy. It’s like Hiroko and Mitsuaki haven’t already had one kid through uni, they’re asking me if I’ve got everything I need, like, every other second.” He snorts a laugh that shouldn’t be cute but is, and his shoulders sag a bit more.

Lance laughs. “Oh no, parents will never get used to kids moving away. Believe me, my mum has watched three of us go already and she’s still having trouble with Jai and V.” In a split-second, Lance decides to mention the gap year everyone seems to have been tiptoeing around. Just to see Keith’s reaction, up close. “It would be funny to watch if I didn’t know I’ll be getting the same treatment next year.”

“Ha, yeah.” Keith stops looking at Lance and stares ahead for a beat, fiddling with a loose thread on his ripped jeans. Oh. So the gap year _is_ bothering Keith.

This shouldn’t surprise Lance, considering Keith’s initial reaction and the way that he’s somehow completely avoided the subject in the ten months since Lance first mentioned it. But Lance had thought that his distance that first week was Keith’s standard response to change - they’ve talked about how Keith doesn’t like change, with his past, and those were deep chats at 2am, the kind that subtly impact your friendship so you don’t realise until a couple months later. He knew Keith would do something like that, but he thought that by now it would all be fine. Apparently not.

Wait. Maybe the reason Keith’s been ignoring him is the gap year? And not, you know, his whole self? But why?

“So why are you going into town?” He asks instead, leaning back against the window, turning his body slightly towards Keith, so that he seems even more relaxed, open and friendly. (Lance knows how body language works, and has mastered it. He sometimes jokes that he’s trilingual because of this, and Hunk at least agrees.)

It works, and Keith gradually stops fiddling, becomes less tense and faces Lance more in return. The conversation flows relatively normally, though any time university or Lance’s gap year come up, Keith tenses a little, in particular for the latter. When they get off the bus, Keith trips over an offer of walking with Lance to where he needs to go, which Lance accepts happily, and offers in return.

“That was so nerve-wracking!” He exclaims as he comes out of the stationery shop V had talked about. “I almost forgot my email and gave him the wrong one!”

“But you didn’t, right?” Keith asks. Lance shakes his head, smiling, still kind of on an adrenaline high. “Well, it all looked like it went well from out here. Do they have a job for you?”

“You think? The guy got me to fill out a form with what times I could do and said he’ll email me if they’re interested, and then I’ve gotta send them my CV. That’s good, right?” Lance starts walking away, making sure Keith is following, as he talks.

“Definitely good,” Keith beams, almost making Lance stumble on a pothole.

“So, uh, where do you need to go?” He asks, hoping Keith won’t try to send him away.

“Oh, you don’t have to come with me if you don’t want to. I’ve gotta get a new pencil case because apparently mine’s not good enough,” he starts, listing things off on his fingers with his truly adorable concentration face on. “Then Hiroko’s making me buy decorations for my room, and I need a new phone charger. Mine’s so frayed now.”

Lance thanks every deity out there that his day is going like this. “Dude. I am _so_ helping you pick out decorations. You couldn’t stop me if you tried,” he grins when Keith raises a confused but amused eyebrow. “I am the fucking _king_ of decorations!”

“I am not filling my room with polaroids like you,” Keith states, causing Lance to stutter indignantly.

“What’s wrong with polaroids? Anyway, you legally have to get fairy lights. It’s practically a rite of passage,” he says vehemently, grabbing Keith’s shoulder and pulling him to the left, towards Tiger. “I bet Shiro had fairy lights.”

Keith frowns, too engrossed in trying to remember this detail of his cousin’s life to notice Lance practically dragging him up the street. Lance knows he’s right about the lights when Keith sighs a little. “Told you!” He exclaims smugly.

“Fine,” Keith concedes, surprisingly still not shaking his shoulder out of Lance’s grip. “But no polaroids or cringey posters.”

“No, but we are getting you a succulent.”

“What!”

In total they spend four hours together in town. After Tiger, where they get the lights, succulent, and a thermos Keith picks out, they go next door to WH Smiths. Keith grabs a plain black pencil case, and Lance forces a mini hole puncher and four new highlighters into Keith’s bag after paying for them himself (“just a little present! I know you’ll use them, you neat freak”). Lance insists they stop for a break, which Keith begins to refuse until he says “Caffe Nero”, which successfully reels him in. About an hour later (with a regular latte with whipped cream, a speciality caramelatte, and arguments about the taste of coffee between them), they continue to a phone shop where Keith buys an android charger, Lance declaring Apple infinitely better the whole way. Finally, Lance drags them all the way to Paperchase to buy drawing pins when he learns that Keith will have a cork board in his room, making sure to find a rainbow and multiple space-related ones. Unfortunately, Keith puts his foot down when Lance reaches out to pick up a lightbox.

“Maybe we should buy you a student cookbook.”

“Lance, I can cook,” Keith repeats, exasperated but laughing. “Just not everything you can!”

“Okay, so I’ll send you my easiest recipes,” Lance replies, half-serious, as they reach the bus stop. He looks behind him when Keith doesn’t immediately respond. “What?” Keith’s just sort of standing there, staring at Lance a little too much, and it’s beginning to make him nervous.

“Would you really? Write up your recipes for me?” He finally says, seemingly awestruck. “Don’t you do everything by memory?”

Lance’s eyes widen slightly, trying to force his mind out of the romantic rabbit hole it is currently falling down. But he’s already planning how he’s going to make this book perfect and neat and colour-coded the way Keith likes. “Of course, dude, I wouldn’t want you to die eating shitty food.” Jokes, yes, those were safe.

Keith smiles so softly in return, Lance is sure his soul falls apart and comes together again, like those boomerang videos he watches on Snapchat of people crushing kinetic sand. Or probably something more poetic.

The moment passes when they hear a bus and realise they’ve just about made it.

“Skip this one,” Keith mumbles a few minutes later as they’re sharing music through Lance’s very taped up splitter. Annoyingly, this more-indie-than-pop artist Keith’s trying to get him to like is actually pretty good, and when he’s not looking, Lance quickly clicks the follow button on Spotify, even though he knows Keith will check when he gets home, as he always does.

Their goodbyes are short but almost sweet, and Lance is left smiling like an idiot for the ten minutes it takes to get from Keith’s stop to his. An elderly lady gives him a knowing look, smirking, when he walks down the aisle to go home, which makes him go a bit red.

———

It seems that whatever was making all his friends sneak around the topic of his gap year is solved now, so for the first time in a while the group chat is full of its normal memes and play fighting between Lance and Keith. Because Keith got into the university they were supposedly competing for, he’s claiming he has won, even though Lance didn’t actually apply for any universities, and Jai walks in on him screaming into a pillow when Keith says “you will never top me, knock-off [shun kazama](https://ghibli.fandom.com/wiki/Shun_Kazama)”.

“Why did everyone just not talk about my gap year for a bit? Like, whenever it came up it seemed like you were all avoiding it,” Lance asks Hunk between sips of Sprite while sitting in a field. It’s the first more-than-surface-level chat they’ve had in a while.

“Oh. That,” Hunk says emphatically, taking a bite of his triple chocolate cookie. “Well, after results day we thought you didn’t wanna talk about it. I thought you didn’t feel great about your results, even though you did really well,” he sends a meaningful look towards Lance. “And I mean, I was feeling sad that it was all one step closer to us moving away, so I guessed you felt similarly.”

“Yeah,” is the only thing Lance can reply with. Hunk knows him too well. It’s all a bit scary.

They sit in silence for a bit, the slight chemical sting of the Sprite pulling Lance out of the thoughts he doesn’t want to be having. Then Hunk breaks the silence, along with the majority of what Lance is sure of right now.

“Also Shiro asked us not to bring it up.”

Lance peers at him. “What? Why?” The implications start multiplying in his mind, questions bouncing around like Pidge that one time when they’d had two hours sleep and four cups of coffee.

Hunk looks sheepish. “Well, uh, I'm not sure if I should be telling you this-”

“You’ve started now, you can’t stop!” The Sprite fizzes and almost sloshes out of the bottle as Lance waves his arms around energetically. His best friend sighs in his usual familiar way.

“Fine, but please don’t say anything.”

“You know I’m a great secret keeper!”

“That you are,” Hunk nods, smiling a little. “Okay, well, Shiro said that the fact that you’ll be here and we’ll all be away is, um, really bothering Keith. So he asked us to maybe not talk about it as much so that Keith could stop overthinking it.”

It’s all Lance can do to not explode there and then. Hunk watches as he processes this information, chewing on his last cookie.

“Keith is worried about me staying here and you all moving away,” Lance states slowly, still trying to understand the significance behind this.

“Not quite,” a thoroughly amused Hunk replies. _He’s finding this way too funny_ , Lance somehow manages to think within the currently tangled mess of his brain. “He’s worried about you staying here and _him_ moving away,” he adds smugly.

Slowly, Lance turns to stare at Hunk, who is grinning like he knows exactly what he’s doing, which he most likely does, seeing as he knows Lance so well. They just stay like that for a couple seconds until Lance releases a strange muted screech sound and dramatically throws himself backwards on the grass, causing Hunk to start laughing uncontrollably.

“What does that mean?! Why can’t he just talk to me like a normal person?!” He exclaims, exasperated.

Wiping away a tear, Hunk reminds him that he’s been crushing on Keith for, what, almost two years now? And _he_ hasn’t said anything, so he should stop being hypocritical.

That makes Lance sit up straight. “Wait. Wait wait wait. Are you implying what I think you’re implying?”

Hunk smirks. “What do you think I’m implying?” When Lance levels him a flat stare, he caves in. Kind of. “Probably?” Lance groans.

“Dude, you and Keith just need to talk. But first,” Hunk says, standing up and stretching. “Do you know why Shiro told us a couple days ago that everything’s fine now? Did something happen between you two already?” He looks at Lance as he also stands, picking up his jacket, and raises an eyebrow when Lance starts to go red. “Oh?”

“Well, we kind of bumped into each other on the bus into town? And, uh,” Lance rubs the back of his head hesitantly. “Maybe spent like four hours together? It was actually a pretty good time. We got Caffe Nero.” He looks up to see Hunk beaming like Lance has given him a constellation. “What?”

“Oh, it all makes sense!! Lance, you have to tell him,” Hunk exclaims, grabbing Lance in one of his patented bear hugs that paradoxically squeeze the life both out of and into the recipient. Lance coughs, both in surprise and to get his oxygen back.

“No! What?! No? Why would I do that? He’s leaving, and just because he’s, uh, worried about me being here doesn’t mean-” He tries to reason, but as soon as he remembers what Hunk said his brain goes back into _holy shit_ mode and he kind of forgets what he was going to say. Luckily, or not, Hunk saves him by interrupting.

“Lance! He’s worried about _not being near you_. Cut the crap!” Though Hunk is still smiling, the almost-outburst shocks Lance a little. “You know what I think? I think Keith likes you back, man. You just need to say something because we both know he won’t.” 

Lance is stunned into silence. Keith like him back? He’s never really even considered it. Why would he? He was, well, Lance, and Keith was - all _that_. But the way Hunk is saying it nearly makes it sound possible. That it isn’t just Keith being really averse to change, that it’s more like he’s averse to _not being around Lance_.

“Holy shit,” Lance says simply. Hunk grins again and pats him heavily on the back.

“There it is. How long do you think you’ll need to focus on the theory before you can put it in practice?” He jokes. Lance scoffs.

“Who said anything about practice?”

Hunk honest-to-God wails. “No, please, I’ve had enough of watching you two do this terrible dance around each other,” he leans on Lance’s back in the way they always do to each other, making Lance grunt quietly. “Please, Lance. End my suffering. Communicate for once. I’m literally begging you.”

Lance just laughs and elbows Hunk in the gut.

———

Turns out, Lance doesn’t have a say about theory or practice.

This time it begins with Allura setting up a very big house party at hers, “in honour of the end of summer and the fact that we’re all around”. It’s clearly just an excuse to get drunk and have fun with friends, and everyone takes it gladly. 

**allura 👑💜:** and please please feel free to invite anyone else!! i wanna make this big loud and fun :))  
**allura 👑💜:** just pls lmk beforehand so i can have an idea of numbers  
**pidgey 💚💻:** this is a dangerous game ur playing  
**pidgey 💚💻:** watch lance invite all of his fuckin siblings  
**me:** i mean  
**me:** they’ll be happy to come allura?  
**allura 👑💜:** how many?  
**me:** uh well probably 5  
**me:** pidge i’ll tell erin  
**allura 👑💜:** that’s cool then!!  
**allura 👑💜:** anyone else?

Everyone invites at least one more person, other than Keith and technically Matt, and that’s how Allura ends up with twenty-nine people at various stages on the drunk scale until very late, with about half planning to sleep over.

“Where’s the fuckin’ juice, man?” Lance stumbles into the kitchen, definitely drunk, and luckily finds it almost empty. Almost, because Keith is sitting on the floor, half-empty schnapps bottle by his knee, staring at the Thai sweet chilli crisp in his hand like it holds the answers to everything. When Lance looks at him, his inebriated mind, adrenaline-fuelled heart, and anxious gut do a fun little tango until someone else practically falls into the room.

It’s Matt. If Lance is drunk, Matt is absolutely wasted. He leans heavily on the counter, grinning stupidly at Lance, who is still standing a good metre from the fridge he was aiming for.

“Juice?” He says suddenly, though neither Keith nor Matt react immediately.

“Nooooo,” the latter slurs. “I’m here for, uhhhh, aid. Of the lemon variety.” He laughs at his own joke as Lance frowns, trying to understand it.

“Oh,” he says blankly. He finally moves and opens the fridge, pulling out the lemonade for Matt and a fancy looking juice bottle that claims to be a blend of passion fruit, orange, and mango. As soon as he passes Matt the lemonade, Adam appears in the doorframe and grabs the bottle from Matt’s hands.

“Aww, where’d it go?” He mumbles as Adam rolls his eyes and pulls Matt’s weight onto his shoulder. Somewhere in Lance’s mind he remembers that Adam doesn’t really like getting super drunk, just tipsy, and that he tends to pick up after his boyfriends.

“He’s fine,” Adam says when he looks up and sees Lance, although Matt most certainly is not fine, and even if he is now, he will not be tomorrow. “That juice is pretty good. Definitely sobers you up a bit.” He nods once at the still vacant Lance and leaves. Lance glances at the juice one more time before unscrewing the cap and realising he needs a glass or a cup, but doesn’t know where they are. He stares at the lid in his hand before deciding, _fuck it_ , and taking a large gulp straight from the bottle. Adam’s comment about sobering up doesn’t make any sense yet.

A loud, obnoxious _crunch_ sound permeates the room. He suddenly remembers Keith is here, and the tango returns in full force when he sees Keith is slowly eating the Thai sweet chilli crisp with all the deliberation of someone performing heart surgery, bringing out that concentration face he’s so weak for.

“Wow,” he sighs involuntarily. Keith doesn’t look up until he’s licked the tiny crumbs off of each individual finger (which doesn’t do anything to Lance, no sir), but when he does it’s as if someone took Lance’s brain and dumped it in a blender, then grabbed his soul and threw it out into the stars for good measure. Keith’s gaze is pretty intense in a normal situation (emphasis on pretty), but now that he’s tipsy or drunk it’s even worse. Lance can barely breathe and his overactive brain kicks right into romantic gear and starts creating poetry about the effect Keith has on him.

Luckily, he still has a shred of self-restraint, so instead of reciting how Keith’s eyes are like dark ink swirling into a handwritten love letter or something, he just asks, “Is that seat taken?”

Keith slowly moves head to look next to him at the floor tile that Lance is pointing at, confused, then nods once towards Lance, not speaking. Lance nods back and sits himself down, taking another swig from the weird juice. He sees Keith glance at the schnapps nearby and decides that regardless of how tipsy or drunk Keith is right now, he should try some of the juice. To communicate this, he just holds up the bottle and raises his eyebrows. Somehow, Keith gets the message and takes a sip before making a face.

“Ew,” he comments, quickly passing it back to Lance.

“Adam said it was supposed to sober you up.”

Keith frowns a little, adorably. “Are you drunk? You’re trying to get sober?”

“Oh,” Lance replies, trying to think. “I’m a bit drunk, yeah. I’m not really trying to be sober, just thought maybe it was a better idea to have a brain, y’know.” Keith nods emphatically. “Are you drunk?”

“No!” He shouts indignantly. Lance looks unimpressed. “Yeah. Yeah, I am.” Seemingly having come to a decision, Keith picks up the schnapps again. “But I don’t want to have a brain. Be sober,” he tips the bottle and Lance remembers he wanted to stop Keith drinking more, though he can’t actually remember when he thought that before so maybe he’s thinking it for the first time. “I drink to forget but I always remember,” Keith quotes, making Lance laugh (although a part of him is worried about what Keith is drinking to forget and hopes he’s just joking). When he stops laughing, Keith is staring at him, mouth slightly open, a very similar expression to the one he had in that shop with the knives they went to last year. It makes Lance feel sick and excited at the same time, which, combined with the alcohol, is probably what makes him say this next thing.

“Why don’t you like my gap year?” He puts the juice bottle down on the floor, screwing the cap back on when he finds it in his other hand. Keith is still staring at him, but luckily imitates his actions with the schnapps bottle.

“Because we were supposed to go to uni together,” he replies, sounding upset. It is glaringly obvious that Keith loses his filter when he’s drunk. Lance kind of feels like he’s taking advantage of him somehow, despite the fact that he himself is also drunk.

“I know.” _Oh no_ , he thinks. _I forgot my brain-mouth filter isn’t working either_. “I wanted us to go together, y’know. I didn’t care about the competition really.” _Shut up, Lance!_ This isn’t really what he wanted to do today.

But then again, he remembers when he was walking to Allura’s with Hunk earlier in the evening, and he kept giving Lance all these weird looks and commenting things like “you know how some people say alcohol is like liquid courage?”. Hunk, that annoying genius, probably knew things were never going to be cleared up between Lance and Keith without an outside factor, because they’re just that difficult. He totally knew this was going to happen. _Fuck_ , Lance thinks with emotion.

On the other hand, Keith is currently gazing at him like he’s said he knows for certain aliens exist because he’s met them. His disbelief is tangible, and it hurts Lance a little that Keith truly thought he would be happy if Keith didn’t get into his first choice of university.

“Oh,” Keith says heavily. “Well, same.” And Lance barely has enough time to process that at least this feeling of his is reciprocated that Keith says something truly earth-shattering. “I keep thinking about deferring so I can stay with you. I don’t think Shiro knows what to make of it.” He chuckles and Lance’s eyes widen so much he should probably be able to see a whole new dimension right now. That’s definitely what it feels like.

“You’re what?! What the fuck, Keith, don’t defer your place and delay your whole plan for me!” Lance exclaims, the meanings behind what he’s just said not fully hitting him until the words have left his mouth. _For me._ Is that really what Keith is thinking? They’ve talked about Keith’s big organised plan to study a master’s degree in forensics, get a job at that place that’s linked with the university, and buy a flat in that city. Lance even knows he recently added “collect succulents” to his list after the one Lance made him get last week. Would Keith delay that for him? Why? Is that even what he meant by that sentence? As Lance loses his mind for a second, Keith frowns, bewildered.

“Why not?” He asks, still glaring. “And anyway, you’re not the boss of me,” he adds obstinately, in his own Keith way.

“What do you mean, why not?” Lance all but shouts, waving his arms around. “You’ve told me all about your plans, what you wanna do, you shouldn’t change them suddenly just for one person! That’s-”

“No,” Keith interrupts, now sounding annoyed. “You don’t get it.”

“I don’t-!” He scoffs, dropping his hands to his sides. “I don’t get what?! What, Keith?”

Leaning forwards, towards Lance, Keith stares right into his eyes and says, slowly, as if he knows that every word will need a second to sink in, “Lance, I would do anything for you.” His gaze flicks between Lance’s eyes as they grow bigger and he forgets how to breathe.

After what feels like a year but is more likely to be five seconds, Lance whispers, “What?”

Keith closes his eyes in a long blink and continues, quieter now to match Lance’s change in volume. “I should’ve guessed this would only happen when we were drunk,” he opens his eyes and Lance, again, thinks back to what Hunk said. “Lance, I really like you, and the only reason I’m kind of calm right now is the alcohol, I promise. I’m definitely panicking inside.”

Lance starts to smile uncontrollably, and the effect on Keith is immediate; his serious expression morphs into one of confusion and amusement, though Lance can also see the anxiety creeping through. “You like me,” he repeats. “And you’re panicking on the inside.”

“Yeah,” Keith smiles, a little awkward, as he turns redder and redder. “I thought I’d add that bit because I know you get worried when you’re the only one who seems to be nervous.” 

Although the romantic part of Lance’s brain screams _I LOVE YOU_ , he manages to just say, “I really like you too,” smile threatening to overcome his face. Keith’s face switches from amusement to shock faster than either of them can think.

“Really?” He breathes, openly awestruck. Lance nods, a bit too fast, making him dizzy. He remembers the alcohol. _Ah yes_ , he thinks, _liquid courage_. “Oh my God,” Keith murmurs. They haven’t stopped staring at each other since Keith confessed. _Confessed_.

Before he can overthink it, or even think it at all, Lance is surging forwards and his hand is coming up to cup Keith’s cheek and his eyes are closing as Keith’s are widening and suddenly his lips are on Keith’s.

The kiss is everything he’s imagined and more. Keith immediately melts into it, moving closer to Lance and shifting a hand to his chest, and his lips are chapped and once he opens his mouth to Lance’s tongue he tastes like the sting of alcohol and the sweetness of the apparently peach-flavoured schnapps and when Keith licks his upper lip he makes a small noise that will never be spoken about again. By the time they break for air, panting a little, their lips are both red and Lance is practically in Keith’s lap.

“Dios mío,” Lance whispers as Keith says “Wow,” eyes darting over each other’s faces.

“Well, that happened,” Lance brushes some of Keith’s hair back behind his ear so Keith kisses him again, short and sweet. “Oh.”

“Yeah,” Keith replies, smiling and then he’s hugging Lance and burying his face in his chest and Lance properly wraps his legs around Keith’s middle to get more comfortable and hug him back, and they’re just intertwined on Allura’s kitchen floor at 1:36am as twenty-seven other people party loudly in the room next door.

When the large, light up analogue clock on the wall ticks over to 1:45am Lance opens his mouth and asks, “What now?”

Keith leans back a little so he can speak and Lance immediately misses the warmth. “Well, I’m definitely more sober already, but I’m still tipsy. What about you?”

“Oh, same,” Lance replies, not having thought about that aspect of their current situation. “But I meant more like, uh, what now with, well, us.” He glances down at Keith nervously, who looks up and quickly kisses him again because he can. Lance blinks six times very fast.

“I don’t know,” Keith says after a pause. “What do you want?”

And this is the bit Lance hates. Because even if two people are miraculously attracted to each other at the same time, it doesn’t mean they both want the same thing, and that’s where everything goes wrong. Realising that Keith knows him too well, as a lot of people seem to these days, he tries to communicate this uncertainty silently. It seems to work, because Keith smiles and puts a calloused hand on Lance’s cheek.

“It’s okay,” he says softly, and Lance falls all over again. 

“You’re going to uni,” eyes now closed, he leans forwards into Keith’s forehead. “I’m staying here. But I-” He swallows. “I want to actually date you, Keith. Y’know, as. As boyfriends.” He squeezes his face up in preparation for a negative response and reopens his eyes when all he gets is silence.

Keith is grinning and relief is lighter than hydrogen. “I wanna be your boyfriend too, Lance.” _Wow_.

“Cool, yeah,” is all he can say and Keith laughs beautifully and he kisses him again because he _can_ and he’s whispering “boyfriend” like it’s a secret, which it sort of is at the moment, and they’re giggling like kids.

“I’m glad I don’t forget things when I’m tipsy,” Keith mumbles and Lance agrees but he’s still stuck back at _I’m staying here_ and he really likes Keith and he likes him back and now they’re _dating_ and Lance would probably trust Keith with his life so he says it again. 

“But I’m staying here.” Keith sees the worry in Lance’s expression and turns semi-serious again.

“I wasn’t kidding, I will defer to stay here with you,” and he looks so stubborn but Lance thinks it’s the most romantic and stupid thing anyone’s ever said to him.

“No,” he starts, and Keith is already opening his mouth to argue but Lance won’t let him. “Keith, you are not fucking up your plan just for me.” He doesn’t get any further.

“ _Just_ you?!” Keith blurts, gripping his shoulders. “Lance, you’re not _just_ anything to me, okay?” And suddenly Lance could cry. “Look, I’m fine doing long-distance or whatever, but I really like you and I just wanna spend time with you, and staying here could be good because I could work and see you all the time-” He stops when Lance sloppily kisses him and holds him close, nestling his face into Keith’s neck.

“Too much?” Keith asks quietly, hugging Lance. He shakes his head against Keith’s shoulder and presses impossibly closer. Keith smiles to himself and starts rubbing circles into Lance’s back. Forget cloud nine, Lance is beyond that right now.

“I - really like you,” Lance repeats when he pulls back, having just enough restraint to not shout the _I love you_ that’s been swirling around his head. That would be too embarrassing. “I don’t want to ruin everything for you. Even if I supposedly mean so much to you,” he smiles wildly and holds up a hand to stop Keith from interrupting, which he somehow knew he was intending to. “You still don’t have to do that for me.”

Keith kisses him quickly three times, grinning the whole time, before responding with, “I don’t have to, but I kinda want to. Either way, this might be a better conversation when we’re sober because I think I would fight the sun for you right now so deferring doesn’t seem like a big deal.”

Lance laughs, blushes, and questions whether Keith would fight the sun for him when sober.

As human, it will all pass, but for now we live.

**Author's Note:**

> thank u for reading, hope u liked it!! thank u for any kudos/bookmarks u may leave, they make my day :)
> 
> if yall want it, i already have ideas around a sequel or smth else, but in classic me fashion im not sure if i should do anything, so [click here to lmk what u think](https://forms.gle/TUUNgQbYhHTZDhrE6) on a google form, anonymously ofc :) thank u!!
> 
> much love to u all in these wacky times, and remember **black lives matter, they always have and they always will. acab and fuck you if you disagree.** hope you're all well!! <333
> 
>  **edit november 2020:** here's some shameless self promo:  
>  _ **OR** do u want a 27k 6-chapter canon universe klance fic? a secret relationship? lance and keith holding each other a lot? some injury-related angst? hunk going through a tough time but coming out of it bc he's strong as fuck? allura & lance being good friends? garrison trio? the team being one big family (change my mind)? ALIENS? a couple of self-sacrificing shits? shiro being a dad but also gossiping with allura and coran? everyone supporting lance bc why not? then i think [boys, Falling](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14732444/chapters/34055372) is good for you! snippets of missions going wrong, life around the castleship, and two paladins trying to hide how much they love each other culminate into a universe-wide search and some really, very nice aliens._  
>  **ALSO** i have [a 47k chatfic](https://archiveofourown.org/works/12956970/chapters/29619108) which was abandoned almost a year ago, but i am working on another one! consider subscribing to my [profile](https://archiveofourown.org/users/icanexplain/pseuds/icanexplain) if you don't want to miss adashi being happy; lance having 8 siblings; the biggest chosen family themes you'll ever see; multiple sexuality crises; hunk being the light in everyone's life; lance being jealous (shocker); keith gunning for the world record in how oblivious you can be; multiple people making multiple bets on a certain couple; a secret relationship; trans lance, shiro and shay; nonbinary pidge; matt being the disaster bisexual he was born to be; [stands on a roof] THE REPRESENTATION CANON NEVER GAVE US; romellura being Iconic; and MUCH more!! (disclaimer: this fic isn't published yet, i already have 5 chapters written but it's looking to be VERY long ;) )
> 
> **thank u for reading!**


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